Top Ten Reasons Why Being a Horse Would Totally Rule
 By Polo the Weirdo   •   17th Jan 2014   •   4,235 views   •   5 comments
Top Ten Reasons Why Being a Horse Would Totally Rule

1. Abundance of carrots means super night vision.

2. Stepping on feet calls for a far more colourful reaction from the victim.

3. No chance of icky vomiting, even while suffering from flu or catching an unexpected glimpse of Justin Bieber.

4. No more shame from being the same species as Justin Bieber.

5. A horse has no obligation to care when being told to ‘lay off Justin Bieber’.

6. No jumping and prancing around when there’s no toilet nearby. Just squat it and drop it.

7. Farting in public is totally acceptable as long as you mask it with an extravagant buck.

8. No more five second rule. You can eat off the floor all day long if you want to!

9. You have your own personal chiropractor, masseuse, physiotherapist, ‘clothes’ fitter, pedicurist and dentist, and you don’t have to pay for any of it.

10. ‘But there was a fly on me’ is a perfectly valid excuse to get away with murder. Literally.
Horse News More In This Category:  General      Horse News More From This Author:  Polo the Weirdo
Aslans Roar  
I like #1, #3, #4, #6 (lol), #7 (lol), #8, #9 and best of all #10 :D xD
  Jan 18, 2014  •  5,112 views
I wanna be a horse! :D
  Jan 18, 2014  •  4,957 views
This makes me happy. :)
It's so hilarious. Such a great article!!
  Jan 18, 2014  •  4,966 views
laoise conway  
I think the best thing about being a horse is ppl come to you rub you and tell you how great you are :D
  49 days ago  •  4,235 views
This just made my day. I can't stop laughing.... do realize there was a petition on that reached well over 100,000 signatures...

...aimed at revoking Beiber's green card and FORBIDDING HIM ENTRANCE into the US?

And that it only needed 100,000 to get brought up in the white house?
  34 days ago  •  4,082 views
 More News by Polo the Weirdo
The Equine Ten Commandments of Inconvenience
27th Nov 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
If you are lucky enough to afford an extremely expensive imported horse, it will spook at its own fart in the quarantine paddock and immediately sustain a career-ending injury. ...
The Best Rider Gadgets That Actually Work - Part II
19th Sep 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
Welcome to part 2 in our quest of finding the best gadgets and gimmicks that can actually help you to improve your riding! Put your body where it should be, and let your brain figure out how to keep it there. You’ll have that perf ...
The Best Rider Gadgets That Actually Work - Part I
30th Aug 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
Do you always find yourself riding with toes like a ballerina? Do you stare into your own lap as if the secrets of the universe are stitched into the crotch of your joddies? Do you ride with shoulders that would make the Hunchback ...
The Good Side of Equestrian Gadgets
16th Aug 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
Gadgets often get a poor reputation in the equestrian world due to their misuse on equine athletes often resulting in harmful or abusive conditions. The debate on whether or not gadgets (like side reins, etc.) ought to be used on ...
400 Horses Killed Each Month Due to COVID Lockdown
17th May 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
The elongated shutdown of racing brings with it many great consequences, many of which are already beginning to show as owners, breeders and trainers alike are forced to begin euthanasia of horses they can no longer afford to keep ...
Why Equestrians Relate to Tiger King
23rd Apr 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
With the Covid-19 pandemic sweeping the globe, people the world over are doing exactly what one would expect modern man to do in a time of great crisis. They are binge-watching eccentric Netflix documentaries. The specific documen ...
How to Stay Sane During Lockdown - A Guide for Equestrians
11th Apr 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
With our current global pandemic, many equestrians the world over are suddenly being forced to face a horseless reality as entire nations enter lockdown. It is a miserable and testing time, but equestrians are tough. We’re gonna m ...
Equestrian In Lockdown
5th Apr 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
On the first day of lockdown, most of us sat in our homes. Silent, shellshocked, looking through old pictures of our horses and trying to come to terms with the fact that we had to be without them for 3 whole weeks. Worrying about ...
  View All News by Polo the Weirdo
©2002 - 2023   PonyBox LLC Create Account Advertise Terms Privacy Contact Us
303 Members Online 271,581 Registered Members 3,172 News Articles 14,362,422 Unique News Article Views 339,349,758 Website Views