Items

Forums
Overachieving Procrastinators
 By Polo the Weirdo   •   3rd Jul 2016   •   1,714 views   •   1 comments
We are the ones lurking in the shadows. Of our duvets. While we binge watch Youtube videos about funny animals, people getting hit in just the right spot, and how cheese is made. We are the protectors. Of notes laminated, so the tears canít soak through. We are the self-saboteurs, the head-desk connection enthusiasts, the financers of energy drink companies. We are the Overachieving Procrastinators.

Fake studies that donít really exist have shown that 85% of students are avid procrastinators. Procrastination is the art of choosing to do literally anything other than the thing you know you have to do. Sound familiar? Yeah, thatís right. The work youíre ignoring to read this article is still there. Itís not just gonna die if you donít believe in it, unless your work involves combining Tinkerbell DNA with any future work you might have to do. In that case, aces to you. But we digress. The point is, students have been known to do anything to avoid doing work. And the more work you have to do, the more important your procrastination activities begin to seem. Some of my most bizarre procrastination activities include:

1. Giving my horse a makeover.
2. Serenading my cat.
3. Browsing horses for sale online, with no intention of buying.
4. Photoshopping pictures of my barn buddies into visual puns of their names.
5. Researching how to determine the sex of a leopard gecko.

Horse Makeover
Horse Makeover

Now, donít misunderstand. I binge-watch series and chat to friends, and do all the normal procrastination activities that all of you do too. But when your procrastination art becomes as developed as mine, traditional procrastination activities just no longer cut it. They are reduced to pre-procrastinatory procrastinations. Basically, in binge-watching I procrastinate procrastinating. I have to finish my pre-procrastinatory procrastinating before I can begin procrastinating for the work I actually have to do. This is a very important part of my process.

But, eventually, even the most procrastinatory of us must finish procrastinating. This is where life becomes a tornado of yuck for the overachieving procrastinator. Your average procrastinator will churn out a barely acceptable piece of work before the deadline with little suffering. The overachieving procrastinator will see the deadline approaching, and suddenly realise that they have to compose a mind-blowingly excellent 5000 word Freudian analysis of Modernist fiction within the next 24 hours. And if it is not an exquisite, incredible, magnificent, and utterly flawless piece of work, then the overachieving procrastinator will sink into a spiral of complete self-loathing (which, admittedly, manifests itself much like procrastination Ė lying in bed and watching series. But, you know, the bad kind of lying in bed and watching series Ė yes, there is a bad kind.).

The life of the overachieving procrastinator is a constant seesaw of stressed relaxation and total panic. We are the epitome of contradiction Ė mysterious creatures, for sure. Why are we the way we are? Why canít we change, and either stop overachieving, or stop procrastinating? One simple decision could release us from the tornado of yuck, and yet, we remain sorely incapable of putting that decision into action. Experts have theorised that perhaps we are just procrastinating making the decision, and that some day the procrastination will end and we will be able to free ourselves from our cycle of despair. But then, given that I just wrote 600 words about procrastination to procrastinate updating my Steam wishlist, to procrastinate getting up and taking a shower so I can leave the house... Well, it seems unlikely.

Perhaps some day the reason for the overachieving procrastinator affliction will become clear to us, but for now, despite all we know about the overachieving procrastinator, there is still so much we donít know.

*cue nature documentary music*
Horse News More In This Category:  General      Horse News More From This Author:  Polo the Weirdo
Winniefield Park  
Ummm...you forgot to mention the productivity apps you search for, download, set up and then forget about. The motivational books you buy, read, write notes in and then shove under the bed. The networking event you go to to meet new clients who you won't contact (but thanks for the yummy munchies, all you can drink k-cup coffee, and pen/tablet stylus). The long list of to dos that you promptly lose. The shopping for just the right computer/tablet/phone/printer...etc...to be wildly productive with....the Facebook group where you spend time kvetching because you have NO time to write. Or, the fact you know every barista by first name at the coffee shop, the names of their family members, where they last vacationed, the color of their first car....oh and that duvet cover? Time for some serious online shopping, because how old is that thing? And oh look...towels are on sale...
  Jul 30, 2016  •  1,820 views
 More News by Polo the Weirdo
400 Horses Killed Each Month Due to COVID Lockdown
17th May 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
The elongated shutdown of racing brings with it many great consequences, many of which are already beginning to show as owners, breeders and trainers alike are forced to begin euthanasia of horses they can no longer afford to keep ...
Why Equestrians Relate to Tiger King
23rd Apr 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
With the Covid-19 pandemic sweeping the globe, people the world over are doing exactly what one would expect modern man to do in a time of great crisis. They are binge-watching eccentric Netflix documentaries. The specific documen ...
How to Stay Sane During Lockdown - A Guide for Equestrians
11th Apr 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
With our current global pandemic, many equestrians the world over are suddenly being forced to face a horseless reality as entire nations enter lockdown. It is a miserable and testing time, but equestrians are tough. Weíre gonna m ...
Equestrian In Lockdown
5th Apr 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
On the first day of lockdown, most of us sat in our homes. Silent, shellshocked, looking through old pictures of our horses and trying to come to terms with the fact that we had to be without them for 3 whole weeks. Worrying about ...
Dear Baby Horse - Regarding The Gate
29th Mar 2020   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
I am a long-time sufferer of your shenanigans, and I am writing to express my concern about recent discussion and the pending decision to implement an exit the arena at any given opportunity policy. I understand that the decision ...
Baby Horse Diaries - Baby Horses Are Like Underwear
10th Nov 2019   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
Yesterday, while dressing to go down to the stables and exercise the half-ton creatures that spend their lives trying to kill me, I got my foot stuck in a hole in my underwear that was definitely not supposed to be there. This mad ...
Baby Horse Diaries - Dont Hurt Me No More
19th Oct 2019   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
Since I have had my Baby Horses, Sunny and De Niro, I have had one fall off each, which is really not bad going through all the toddler tantrums! Honestly, I was feeling quite proud of myself. Until today. ...
Baby Horse Diaries - If Baby Horses Could Name Things
28th Sep 2019   |   General   |   Polo the Weirdo
If youíve ever owned, trained, or otherwise interacted with a baby horse, you will know that sometimes they just seem to see the world differently to us. Whether itís the shallow rain puddle thatís clearly hiding sharks, or the in ...
  View All News by Polo the Weirdo
 
©2002 - 2020   PonyBox LLC Create Account Terms & Conditions Privacy Contact Us
180 Members Online 267,464 Registered Members 2,735 News Articles 11,625,601 Unique News Article Views 276,598,818 Website Views